Fast Company: 5 Ways to Fend Off your Mid-Career Identity Crisis
As seen in Fast Company, 02-21-24
5 ways to fend off your mid-career identity crisis
Climbing the career ladder can make us lose sight of who we really are. Fortunately, there are steps we can take to avoid this pitfall.
BY CAT O'SHAUGHNESSY COFFRIN 3 MINUTE READ
Have you ever achieved a major goal at work, only to find yourself wondering, “Do I even want this anymore?” This may be a mid-career identity crisis, a common experience for leaders who are near the pinnacle of professional success.
The good news is that you can prepare for this moment, and maybe even avoid it altogether. Here are five ways to do so, with some practical tips from leaders who have been there.
EXPECT IT TO HAPPEN
The path to avoiding an identity crisis begins with acknowledging that it could happen. While this can be unnerving, it can also serve as a helpful call to action.
“It’s scary to realize you don’t know who you are,” says one C-Suite healthcare executive who navigated her own mid-career crisis a few years ago. Many of us prefer to hide from an impending crisis by burying ourselves in work.
But we can only avoid it for so long. “Once you see it, you can’t unsee it,” she says. “You have to take action.”
SEPARATE YOUR IDENTITY FROM THAT OF YOUR EMPLOYER
As a leader, it is common to conflate your personal identity with that of the company you represent. We typically introduce ourselves by our work, but over time we start to lose sight of where our individual self ends and our professional self begins.
“Looking back, I intertwined my job and my identity so much that I lost sight of who I was,” says the healthcare executive, reflecting on her own experience. “My hard work and achievements continued to be rewarded, and so I kept going. And I kept losing myself.”
To disentangle your own identity from your job, try exploring the traits that define you, and that have remained constant since long before your career success.
For example, a tech industry sustainability executive recently recalled how she was known as the “pied piper” in her neighborhood growing up. She had an early knack for attracting followers and leading initiatives—a trait, she realized, she still uses today, in her work and beyond. This observation helped her reconnect with who she is separate from the formal job she does.
Another great exercise is to revisit your earliest career aspirations and look at what it was about these jobs that appealed to you. Hiding behind these memories are valuable insights into your innate curiosities and interests.
CONSIDER A PIVOT
A great way to rediscover your sense of self is to change your context. This requires translating your expertise for a new sector or role—which can be tough but empowering.
“I made a significant career pivot when I moved from working in-house to serving as a talent adviser to a wide array of nonprofit agencies,” says Keecia James, an independent Talent Leader and Advisor based in Chicago.
Following this change, James says, “my work now allows me to impact a multitude of diverse agencies, all with incredible missions and values.”
To translate your value, try looking back at the proof points throughout your life and your career. What impact do you tend to have on a team, project, or organization? What do you leave behind?
Put this into writing, and then reframe it in a way that can be relevant to a new industry or position. Test it out with people who have the job you covet and ask for their feedback along the way.
LEAN ON OTHERS
We tend to be far more critical of ourselves than those around us. Use this moment to invite colleagues, friends, and mentors to help you see yourself in a more generous light.
Ask for their take on your unique superpowers, your greatest impacts, and what they suggest you celebrate more about yourself. This is a great way to infuse fresh thinking and creativity into your exploration.
Another great resource is peer networks. Getting outside of your usual network can broaden your thinking and offer a safe place to explore new ideas. “Find a community where you can safely pick up your head and be as kind and gentle to yourself as you are to others,” says the healthcare executive, who cites her membership with the women’s leadership group Chief as a game changer.
LEAN INTO THE QUESTIONS
It can be daunting to define yourself and what you want in life. But the longer you go without trying, the harder this effort will become.
So, try a reframe: lean into the big questions, not away.
Break it into smaller pieces and commit to the effort. Set aside a small amount of time each day or week to journal, meditate, and be alone. You may find that what first looked like an impending crisis is instead a helpful reminder to build habits that serve yourself better over the course of your career.